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assignment A Game of Firsts

Monday night's game against the Village Inn was a game of firsts.

It was the first time the team was going to meet the Admirals rookies as Derek and Aaron were making their long awaited Admirals debut.

It was the first time the Admirals played the Village People since the disappointing end to their season last year Game1 and Game 2.

It was the first time a player in this league has been suspended for violation of the performance enhancing drug policy (more on this below).

It was the first time Alberto, Mr. Baseball himself, pulled a no show on the team. If you follow the NBA and are familiar with the story of Jerry West's silhouette being used as their logo, Alberto is the Jerry West of our league:

He's the slo-pitch logo. So, Mr. Logo, we hope you are okay and it was simply old age setting in and you just forgot about Monday night's game. Hit us up to let us know that you are okay.

In additional to Alberto, Aaron also missed the game and didn't sign out via the web site. In case everyone was not aware, we do have a signout sheet on the web site, feel free to update it for any games you know you cannot make so we can ensure we have enough players to field a team to avoid the league default fine. If you need assistance with the functionality of the web site, feel free to contact Sean.

It was the first time a player has inquired about the league's insurance policy and whether the policy would allow him to take a ball to the face and commence his early retirement plans.

The fearless leader of the Admirals, Sean Dunn, was mysteriously absent from this game. Late last week he informed the team that he had to "travel to Montreal for work" and would miss both games this week. In his absence, emails were uncovered that truly explained his last minute absence. Apparently Sean was the first victim of the newly enacted Newcastle Slo-Pitch Performance Enhancing Drug (or NSPPED for short) policy. Over the winter Sean added muscle mass and has been crushing the ball in the Newcastle league and is tied for the Whitby league in homeruns (ignore that fact that diamonds were designed for 10 year olds playing with wiffle balls). The NSPPED enforcement team immediately took notice of his elevated stats as well as the dramatic change in his physic and performed a surprise urine test which resulted in a week suspension to Sean, thus explaining his last minute "work trip to Montreal".

2018 Sean:

2019 Sean:

On to the game itself, the Admirals were the visitors this evening and started the game on the sticks where they sent 11 batters to the plate and scored 6 runs. Two of those runs came off a bomb to left off Ryan's bat. In the bottom half of the first the Village people sent 6 batters to the plate and cashed in 3 runs from a bomb over the fence in left-center.

The Admirals picked up where they left off in the second inning sending 9 batters to the plate and scoring 5 runs. The Village People responded with 3 runs of their own in the bottom of the second to make this a 11-6 game in favour of the Admirals. The damage could have been worse if not for the heroics of the Admirals newest center fielder Derek. Derek fielded a ball in centerfield and unleashed his cannon and threw a laser guided missile to home plate stopping the Village People dead in their tracks.

In the third inning the Admirals led off the inning with a single but the next three batters couldn't advance the runner any further than second base and ended their half of the inning with zero runs across the plate. The Village People came up with the heart of their order and plated two more runs. After three innings, the score was 11-8 in favour of the Admirals.

The fourth inning started promising for the Admirals, the first two batters each got on with singles and Mitch came to the plate with one out and hit a well placed single to right. Jomo took too large a turn around third base without knowing the location of the ball and got caught in no man's land. He danced up and down the third base line for what seemed like an eternity without comprehending he had crossed the commit line three or four times. Eventually he attempted to make it home but was easily thrown out in the process. His mistake immediately came back to haunt him when Ryan launched a deep shot to left that was caught on the warning track for the third out (but should have been a run scoring sacrifice fly second out if he was a smarter base runner). With one run scored in the top of the fourth, the Admirals went into the bottom of the fourth leading 12-8.

Then the bottom of the fourth inning happened. For those of you who were around last year you know that we faced this very team in the playoffs in a best of three matchup. Due to a series of events you had to actually see to believe, the Admirals were knocked out last year by the village people in two straight games (Game1 and Game 2).

Tonight's game was the chance for the Admirals to make up for last year's disappointing end to the season. However something strange occurred in the bottom of the fourth inning, the Village People gathered in their dugout and pointed at the left side of the Admirals infield like they saw something familiar that made them happy:

Confused by their emotions the Admiral's defense settled in to get three quick outs so they could get back on the sticks. What transpired over the next 14 Village People batters was the inning imposed maximum ten runs scored where a lot of the hits seemed to be directed at the growingly frustrated Admirals shortstop. While he made a great out early in the inning by snagging a low line drive to his left, the Village People were not deterred and with the memory of last August's playoff match-up against the Admirals fresh in their heads, they continued to test the Admirals shortstop and with their 10 runs, taking the lead over the Admirals 18-12.

The bottom of the fourth consumed a lot of time and the umpire signaled that the 5th inning would be the last inning of the game. The Admirals were able to plate two additional runs before recording three outs and ending the game with a losing score of 14-18.

As is the norm after each game, the Admirals retreated to the parking lot to enjoy a few post-game beverages with the hopes of celebrating their victory like Marc Gasol earlier in the day:

But in fact ended up like this:

Repeatedly inquiring to anyone who would listen who we could sue and what level of insurance coverage does the league have in the event we decide to start using our faces in place of our gloves?

The Admirals hope to bounce back with a quick turnaround on Tuesday @ 6:30 against the A-Team .

Statistical highlights

• Antonio: 3 for 3, 3 runs scored
• Jomo: 3 for 3, 2 runs scored
• Mike: 3 for 3, 2 runs scored
• Andrew: 3 for 3

• Ryan: 1

• Ryan: 1

• Antonio: 1
• Mike: 1
• Andrew: 1
• Derek: 1
• Jomo: 1

• Ryan: 3
• Jomo: 3
• Mitch: 2
• Darrell: 2


Team 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 Final
Admirals 6 5 0 1 2 0 0 14
Village Inn 3 3 2 10 0 0 0 18
Tags: #ped, #boom, #revengefail, #slopitchinsurancepolicy
Posted on: Tuesday June 18th, 2019 at 1:19PM